Parent Life Coach, specializing in helping Foster and Adoptive Parents.
Kate Hlava is a mom of 6 through biology, adoption and fostering. She has been helping families for years navigate the ups and downs of parenting – especially those with foster and adoptive kids.
THINKING OF FOSTERING / ADOPTION?
When we told folks we were considering adoption many years ago, we got as many negative responses as supportive ones. Don’t even get me started about what folks said when we mentioned we were going to foster! Yet, we knew in our hearts that adoption and fostering was for us. And we have no regrets. Don’t let others dissuade you from what calls you!
Because I have children both through biology and adoption, I am often asked if I love my bio kids more. I can honestly say I do not. But all do love all 4 of them differently.
I am not going to lie, foster parenting is not easy. It is, however the most fulfilling thing I have ever done. Are you considering fostering? Let me help you discover if it’s right for you?
Every person deserves to be part of a loving family. Arguably, every family is a little crazy in its own way BUT feeling safe and loved can make up for a whole lot of crazy.
Someone once said to me that life is a series of risks. And all I can say to that is Amen! There are no guarantees so all you can do is keep on keeping on and make the best decisions you can with the information you have. But don’t be afraid to do something just because it’s risky.
Ever hear I could never foster/adopt? I have heard that too many times to count.
Kate has been my life coach for a while now. She always gives me solid advice. Never passing judgment, making her very easy to talk to. I’m fortunate to have found her. ❤️
Sign up for a FREE Zoom Session to Meet Kate! You will have an opportunity to send in your Q&As beforehand.
PARENTING IS HARD
26 years ago when I became a mother, I swore I was going to be just like Donna Reed, Que sera, seraing my way through motherhood. That wore off fairly quickly….and as time wore on and the lunatics took over the asylum, it became clear that not only was I not going to be a perfect mom, I was going to have more adequate mom days then I’d care to admit. But you know what? My kids are okay, and your kids will be too. Some days it’s enough to keep the maniacs alive and fed.
Us moms are very hard on ourselves and often we think we have to be perfect. But perfection is unattainable and honestly, I think it’s better our kids see we are imperfect. It allows them to be imperfect too.
Some days being a foster parent is easy. Other days it is hard, really hard. Sometimes you realize the system is broken. Bio parents, kids in the system, foster parents – all pay a price. I love being a foster mom and find it one of the most fulfilling things I’ve ever done. However, sometimes I just want to throw a few punches, yell at all the people and cry. Some days are just like that. I gave up trying to suppress my feelings long ago. I believe that It is okay to have hard days. What human doesn’t? So sometimes I cry, let all the feelings out, and maybe eat a cookie (or 12) and then dust myself off and remember there are people in this world that need me to keep it together and not punch people (even when they need to be punched).
“Foster care is risky. Adoption is risky. Love itself is always risky.” – Orphan Justice
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Please keep in mind, as a life coach, Kate Hlava, does not diagnose or treat mood disorders or other mental illnesses. Life coaching focuses on the direction you want your life to go and not on uncovering underlying mental health issues. Those issues are reserved for licensed mental health professionals. When necessary, a referral for those services will be provided.